Happiness...on MESS

I recently wrote on my Personal Diary a poem about happiness.

 

I wrote that (loosely translated here),

 

Happiness is

When nothing is between you and what you like

When you have the resilience to stand up even when you fall

When someone is there, meticulously caring for and protecting you

When a vulnerable heart just gets stronger than ever

 

Happiness is also

When you have a confident to rely on when you are down

When you are deep in thoughts, someone is quietly accompanying you

When someone is there to guide you to find the meaning of life

When you don't have to hide - you are just you

 

There is no need to compare and compete with others to know if you are happy

For happiness is just when life is spent in fun and joy

 

This has got to be one of the best things I have ever written in my diary; there is this feeling that kicks in my heart whenever I read it. I love it so much I read it to myself so many times a day and I keep reminding myself about it. I've also put it on my Laptop screen.

 

Maybe it's just me feeling so attached to these words.

 

It is now my little reminder to myself that it is not that difficult after all to be happy; it all depends on what one's definition of happiness is. Perhaps, when we try to be less harsh on myself - something I've recently realised and a lesson I'm still in the process of learning - and learn to see simple joys in life, we can all be a little happier and feel much better.

 

I've been at an emotional tug-o-war with myself these few weeks which have been very evident based on the contrast so there was long gap in post. I sink in so quickly, but yet I stand up just as quickly. Even I myself don't know what to expect my emotions to turn out to in a random day, for it is now just so unpredictable. I can be full of joy and smiles, but yet another day I may just be crying alone. Many things in my life right now are taking a toll on me - this vulnerable person here - having to deal with it. All I can do right now seems to be to just keep 'psycho-ing' myself that I'll be fine and I'll do great, but the question mark still stands.

 

Perhaps only time will tell.